Must Keep Knitting

I am a firm believer that music heals your soul, especially if you close the door and just belt out the tunes.  I wish I was a firm believer that the next song that plays will tell me what is going to happen, but I know that’s no use.  I’ve already tried, and each song was just a more depressing love song.

But, I do believe that there are certain songs that just comfort you during hard times.  So, I’ve had “Round Here” (Counting Crows), “Violet Hills” (Coldplay), “Bad Day” (Fuel), and “Hand me Down” (Matchbox Twenty), on repeat for the past few hours.

As soon as I got the motivation to write a post, I became lost for words.  I could tell you about how I’ve been knitting a bit.  I finished a sock pattern, a shawl, and have began work on a scarf.  I’ve added new things to the etsy store, and even reached my 100th sale. I’ve ordered more yarn, even though I should have…but that delft pillow in the Interweave Holiday Knits is just too pretty to pass up. I’ve turned to knitting tonight as a comfort.  As I reached the end of a row, I picked up my computer to tell you a little more about my life.

I’m a junior in college and am currently searching for internships.  I just recently had my first interview, which really didn’t go as well as I planned.  I had my hopes torn down a little bit more by someone very close to me.  One thing I like about myself though, is that I’m a fighter and am usually more determined when people tell me I can’t do something.  At the same time, though, I wonder if I’m in the right major or if I was just pushed in to it.  I don’t know if I have the heart or “balls” to be in the business world.  I have a realistic dream job, but I also have a dream that I think will bring me happiness.   I guess only time will tell where I end up.

On top of that search, this semester is kicking my butt!  I’m making the first Cs of my life, but am not really motivated to try harder.  I just feel like that even though people say college is the time to explore life and yourself, but some professors definitely do not believe that.

Aside from school, there’s been some ups and downs in the relationship side of life.  I know every couple goes through tough times…but I think our’s is a monthly cycle – rough, okay, and great.  It works for us I guess, and we’re in the great right now.

Then there is just me, and how I feel about myself – which isn’t too great at night, but mostly fine during the day.  Tonight is actually a good night for me, despite some negative medical news I received earlier.  So now that I’ve realized my ramblings weren’t what I intended them to be, I’m going to go back to belting out my songs.